entry one:

THIS IS A CLEAN SLATE                                                                  Welcome aboard, reader. Tonight, I present you what's I am bs-ing, and for the return I only expect from you to undisturbed piece in the head. Maybe even a little bit of care, I don't know, Today is 10th of May 2024, clock is showing 10:37AM. Few hours ago I wrote this small thing: 

I take and take and take

whatever is around, enough for me to stick

my ears are full of cotton

I try to drain the cloth, but no más

I took and took and took

Tomorrow I will find new toys to move around

I will talk to myself, try to make it alright, make the noices go away

only to drain this regret, still I know, no dice

I can feel the darkness come around

So I put and think it throughly what I had took and pray to the sky

Please please please let me live one more day in the light

You can see from here, I live it time at a time.

I do not serve another act for the very next day

now I see it, maybe this is what is pulling me down

  down to the floor, and I feel the this big weight, I can't move around.

On one of those days, believe me all I wanna do it is to settle around, plow my own soil, my beautiful trees and garden.

I am broken so bad, my bones aren't merging right. 

All my meat is smothering what's inside

and all my veins are reeking with filth 

and all my bones are just wrong. 

Do what with it, thats the word I am leaving to you.

Cause I can't have it any other way, except don't's and can't's and oh how I wish for otherwise's.

I've waited a forever, so long time to turn it around, get a rewrite. 

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This what I write seems so incomplete and distasteful but the grown up says: Girl, you gotta start at somewhere. 

So this is me starting. I daydreamed so many ways to do the writings, but this time, I will actually sit around and make an effort. 

I will see me around in no time,

Till then, bye.